Retired Life: Now That Volleyball Is Done, How Can I Possibly Exercise If I Hate It?! More Angst From the Mind of a 22 Year Old

Ah, the retired life. Filled with leisure, going to bed at 8pm, and drinking decaf coffee…

Or nah.

So as you (who either know me or have stalked my Instagram- @kristin_hovie omg follow me! <3) may know, my collegiate volleyball career ended late November. My fellow teammates and I swagged out for four games then fell to U-Albany, who we previously beat in 2012 to earn a bid to the NCAA tournament. But do not fret! I was not upset over the loss, as I had “bigger and better plans”.

Namely, not working out for a solid month in spite. Even though I needed time off to mend a torn ab, I did not make any attempt to exercise other than chasing after a bag of Doritos that had blown away in the wind one day. I despised working out. I could not ever leave the gym without beating myself up for not working out hard enough. I never completed enough sprints, I didn’t sweat enough, and I certainly didn’t want to fight grown ass men for a rack so I could at least attempt a few futile squats. Blah blah blah blah. I made up countless excuses and believed that I either would need to nearly pass out to feel like I did something, or just not go to the gym at all.

I completely realize beating myself up and thinking in “black and white ” is flawed. Avoiding working out simply because I didn’t want to feel bad about myself (which is ironic, because not working out led me to having terrible body image anyway) was a lose-lose situation. I’ve struggled with this for awhile. Because I’m bipolar, working out can sometimes be a struggle for me. I’m not professing this to the world for sympathy- honestly, if you played a sport with me, this diagnosis makes a loooooot of sense (smacking myself during practice for not passing a ball perfectly, repeatedly running to the bathroom to cry, bouts of hyperness where I can’t shut up, etc). I say this instead, as a way to connect with others who feel the same way about working out. I know I’m writing for a very small audience here, but if I can help anyone out there, I will have considered myself successful.

This past December, I tried to make some changes. (Eh mah gawd! Here comes the turning point- buckle up!) I’m sick and tired of feeling shitty about my body and not doing anything about it out of fear that I’ll never measure up to my own or someone else’s standards. My mom has always told my sister and I to try and eat healthy foods 80% of the time, eat as much leafy greens as possible, work out, and however you look as a result is how you’re meant to be. I could work out like nuts and eat super healthy, but I’ll never, ever look like Candice Swanepoel or Alessandra Ambrosio. It’s just how I am built and I think my mom has a great point in saying what she did. (See her own blog here!)

As many college students do while home on break, I spent a shit-load of time on my computer. I then Googled various ways to exercise for inspiration. I knew I wanted to begin running distance but hated straight up running on the treadmill for 50 minutes, I wanted to commit myself to a daily ab routine, and would like to incorporate weight lifting and/or circuits as well. My search led me to several different bloggers who I follow on as many social media sites as possible. These bloggers were enough to inspire me to work out- they filled their blogs with images of running on the beach in Monaco, doing CrossFit classes in Stockholm, and skiing in Japan. They appeared to be having so much fun working out, eating good food, and traveling. Seeing their Instagram pics of their morning workouts helps me get out of bed every morning to go work out myself- and I don’t dread it in the slightest! Here are my top 3 bloggers:

1.) Janni Delér: 20 something year old Swede who travels all over the world and frequently blogs about her workouts. She has some amazing pictures too that serve as my daily workout (and also fashion) inspo.

2.) Blonde Ponytail: Jess Allen, a badass former softball player at Stanford and former softball coach at Creighton is a NSCA-CSCS cerified personal trainer who has some really challenging workouts that are NEVER boring! I often have to simplify many of her workouts because they are too hard- she has workouts you can do at home, at the gym, on the treadmill…etc.

3.) Alexandra Bring: another 20 something year old Swede who serves as my daily work out inspo. She used to be overweight, then became anorexic, and now trains HARD and has her own line of fitness paraphernalia. She has an amazing backstory. Her blogs are mostly pictures and writing in Swedish, but I love seeing how positive she is about working out.

Top left going clockwise: Alexandra Bring, Blonde Ponytail, and Janni Delér.

Top left going clockwise: Alexandra Bring, Blonde Ponytail, and Janni Delér.

As for what I do now to work out, I’ve found a workout system that works best for me so far and I always keep it subject to change. My brother gave me his cross-country team’s ab routine (here) that I do three times/week as well as their circuit/weight routine that I do twice/week (here) that also includes abs.

The Ab Routine and Circuits: I do the circuits on Tuesday/Thursdays with 45 min of cardio. I do the abs Monday/Wednesday/Friday in addition to an hour of cardio. Courtesy of Macalester Athletics.

The Ab Routine and Circuits: I do the circuits on Tuesday/Thursdays with 45 min of cardio. I do the abs Monday/Wednesday/Friday in addition to an hour of cardio. Courtesy of Macalester Athletics.

I also like to throw in some of the Blonde Ponytail’s workouts (this one here kicked my ass the other day). Altogether, I work out six times a week. Each day I do an hour of cardio (or 30 min when I have lift/circuits twice a week), 20 minutes of abs, 5 minutes of toning exercises (also from the Blonde Ponytail), and 5 minutes-ish of stretching/yoga poses. It may sound like a lot, but I like to mix up my cardio. One day I’ll swim, the next I’ll do a spin class or sprints/recovery runs. By the end, I’m usually beat and ready to go home and drink some tea and have toast with avocado.

An example of the cardio I'll do with toning exercises I do before abs. Courtesy of blondponytail.com

An example of the cardio I’ll do with toning exercises I do before abs. Courtesy of blondponytail.com

This is what I’ve found works for me. I make sure I surround myself with positive influences on social media, eat healthy 80% of the time (the other 20% I usually eat a burger and fries or Taco Bell much to my mom’s dismay), and forgive myself when I’m not able to push myself as hard as some other days. I guess we will see how this goes, I’ve always been one to make big goals for myself and not follow through all the way (damn manic stage) but this time I’m feeling a little better about myself.

I know this post was a little less funny than some of the others, but next post will be funnier, promise. I’m thinking about incorporating some of the entries of my 7th grade diary wherein I signed off as “ACE” and wrote about the angst of not knowing whether my crush knew I loved him because I made eye contact with him that one time… Until then,

KH/*ACE*

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